Sometimes when you’re lying in bed and feel some small object poking you and you think, “the stupid dogs just brought a rock into the bed again” and you ignore the rock because you’d prefer to not completely wake up in the middle of the night, it’s actually worth it to not ignore it and to just completely wake up in the middle of the night in case it’s not a rock.

Because sometimes you wake up the next day and find out you’ve been sleeping on a thumbtack all night. I’m kind of scared to have a cup of coffee because I’ll freak out if it shoots out of my sides in various places like a leaky hose.

Once again, I impressively fail the Princess and the Pea test.