I wonder if there’s market for iPad apps for dogs? You could have games like “Sleeping Guy!®” and it would be a guy on a bed. Your task would be to try to tap the screen so as to stick your tongue into some guy’s ears and face while he’s asleep, but he’d present obstacles like covering his head with a pillow and you’d have to look for weak spots in his defense.

Maybe you’d spot a little gap by his elbow, or you could wedge your head underneath the back of his neck and dislodge his defense, or you could just plop down on his stomach and roll around until he lifted his hands to protect his undefended groinal region, and once you found a weakness you could start scoring points.

Once a particularly bad vulnerability appeared, or once you’d gotten in successful attacks to fill up your bonus meter, you could press the flashing on-screen button for a “Special Attack” and then two other dogs and a chihuahua would appear out of nowhere for a devastating Finishing Move. The earlier you achieve complete awakeness in the Guy, the larger your score. As levels get more difficult, you’d start in almost complete darkness, but it probably wouldn’t take any longer to complete the level quickly once you had a good set of moves figured out because they’d work just as well in the dark.

There wouldn’t be any way to lose the game though, the defenses would be very effective at first, but as long as you just repeated the same things over and over and over, you’d eventually find a gap and the first sign of weakness would mean that you’re already very near victory.