I just had the first zombie dream I’ve ever remembered. I had been awake already, it was dawn and the window was open and the whole world was birds, amazing. Since the sun was about to come up, I knew I was going to get the best 4 minutes of sleep I get a day and I just got to it.

The dream itself was pretty normal zombie stuff, part Walking Dead and part Resident Evil and I was in a small group of survivors struggling to survive or something. My dog Molly was in the dream, and I remember being inordinately proud that she wasn’t eating any of the dead. At all. I figured she’d been selected as “the dog” because she has great forehead wrinkles when she’s concerned.

The usual horror and stuff was going on around me but I was basically making wisecracks like I would have if I’d been watching a DVD, I remember during one incident where I turned to the guy next to me and said, “Looks like night-swimming in that murky water wasn’t a good idea after all.”

During the final moments of the dream, my little group of survivors had been overrun, it was outdoors and daytime, and I was one of the few people left. My arms were immobilized and there was a zombie at each of my knees. Molly was next to me, still totally not eating anyone. I looked down to see the zombies take their first kneecap chomps, and I said, “Do either one of you have an aspirin or something? I have a feeling this is going to hurt.” Everyone, zombies and victims, stopped what they were doing and looked up at me, and I woke up laughing. The chihuahua next to my face had a suspicious eye half open and looking at me, and my big shepherd mix was standing over me with a really funny look on his face.