Another of my angsty dreams was about lemons; instead of actual misfortune people were given literal lemons.

I got a job working for a guy who wanted to market lemon-slingshots because he thought shooting people in the nuts with a lemon would be a funnier way to end the phrase “if life gives you lemons.”

My misgivings about empowering people to blast other people’s satchels with lemons made my marketing role contentious and unrewarding.